The Anxiety of Being Constantly Reachable

Technology is all around us, playing a consistent role in everybody’s life. Through various social media applications, messaging platforms, and video calling sites, it has become easier than ever to get in contact with someone. We can send messages instantly, view when someone reads our message, track packages and delivery people, and stay up to date on a person’s life constantly throughout the day. Although these conveniences can easily strengthen relationships and increase connection, it is very easy for this level of reachability to become a burden and add a new pressure to everyday life.

For many people, the ability to be reachable has shifted from an option to an expectation that needs to be fulfilled.

Given the convenience of cellphones, it is now often expected to check a text during a dinner, view a post during the workday, or answer an email that came in late at night. If we wait too long, an unspoken assumption grows that one has seen the message and should’ve responded by now. We begin to overthink – what if they think I’m being rude? Or worse, think I don’t want to speak to them at all? What if they won’t message me again as a result? 

Virtual Causes of Anxiety

Over time, pressure to be online can create a sense of obligation. Checking phones as a leisurely activity whenever it is convenient has become something of a chore or a task, checking to avoid missing something important or disappointing someone. 

Features like read receipts and activity status updates can intensify this feeling of obligation. Although these features were first created for the purpose of displaying productivity and active interest, they have evolved into an expectation about response times. If a sender saw a reply to a message within three minutes, for example, it could create an internal pressure to respond to future messages with the same speed, increasing anxiety. In reality, being connected to a device or actively using one does not equate to having the time or emotional bandwidth to engage with a message at that moment.

Stigma Around Being Offline

People have begun to notice signs that reachability is affecting them, such as feeling anxious when notifications chime or guilt when they don’t immediately respond. The challenge is that these reactions have been normalized. There is a reason we feel an obligation to respond to a message right away or avoid going online altogether to not be seen as “active.”

In today’s society that values productivity and communication, wanting to take a step back from technology can feel taboo or unreasonable. Constant connectivity has become a social norm in the US, yet this expectation is far from universal. For example, countries such as France and Australia have passed “Right to Disconnect” laws meaning that employees cannot be scrutinized for not responding to emails after work hours. Portugal also passed a similar labor law a few years ago prohibiting employers from contacting employees outside of work hours, giving workers the right to rest. Just as these laws suggest, healthy boundaries and self-regulation is important.

Detaching From Devices

Creating space from a screen can play a positive role on people’s mental health and emotion regulation. This space can manifest itself in multiple ways, whether that be physical distance from a device, silencing notifications for a period of time, or setting designated hours for response. For example, when feeling stressed over responding to an email right before bed, try making a note to respond in the morning and then reading a book. Instead of scrolling during a moment of downtime, try taking a walk outside. Other tools like schedule-sending an email in advance can help reduce anxiety levels closer to a deadline. Technology was designed to make communication easier and keep us connected, but that ease can be offset when it becomes a burden to our mental health. Constant connection and well-being are not the same thing and it is important to be able to find a balance between the two. Sometimes, the best reminder or notification to set can be that not everything needs an immediate reply and it is okay to take a step back.